Once upon a time ——- Well, the afternoon of July 1st 2016 to be precise, and having just battled the traffic beast that is the Gubrist tunnel, my golfing princess and I were heading north in our trusty carriage of many horses in search of adventure. That is to say we were on our way to the next two rounds of Golf4Fun`s tournament series to be played in the southern German spa town of Bad Bellingen.
After making good speed through foreign lands, we arrived at our destination with time to spare, and having made good our toilet ( that’s having a shower and getting changed !!!) it was Apero time, with the fine weather allowing us to dine al fresco, under the starry heavens, on a sumptuous meal of Chateaubriand served by our host the Markushof hotel. The evening was made even sweeter with the news that the Welsh dragons had defeated the Belgian warlocks in the Euro 2016 football quarter finals. After a few celebratory snifters it was abed, just before the clock struck twelve thus avoiding pumpkins turning into things and other strange goings on. (No Absinth, honest)
Saturday morning dawned (pardon the pun), and the sky was more Hobbit like, grey dark and wet. Luckily we were not due at court till later, and so were able to take full advantage of the delicious repast served as breakfast in the hotel annexe.
Today we were to do battle with the Quellenhof, featuring 156 sand traps and 6340 meters of undulating parkland. The weather conditions continued to be inclement and so wet weather armour was donned. Fortunately though by the time we managed to get to the turn the powerful magic of our Gaelic organiser had come to bear and the rain stopped falling and temperatures rose. Not that it helped my scoring nor diminished the mounting tally of lost golf balls. In the end finishing with just 24 points, a true reflection of a bad day `s golf. As I summed it up to our InnerImage wizard Ron (nice cape !!!) on the last green — it was lucky his camera was digital, otherwise he would have run out of film, taking pictures of me holing out.
The pain was brief though as the International Beer Bar of Zurich came to the rescue, as a bottle of malted ale was placed in my hands and again all was good with the world. It seemed though that a lot of the field, bar a few very exceptional rounds, had had a difficult day, and were determined to do better on the Sunday.
First though `twas off to the grand feasting hall of the Markushof hostelry for a fine banquet, although someone seemed to have forgotten to book the minstrels, dancing girls and the jugglers. There was certainly not a lack of storytelling however. Germany beat Italy on penalties (of course!!!) in the Euros, but I had retired before the fireworks and car horns bit as the morrow was to be an early start.
Sunday and Lo!! Sunshine !!. Time to slap on that sun protection cream, not needed the day before, as supplied by sponsor Ultrasun as well as stocking up on rehydration material in the form of our drinks sponsor`s offering of Focus Water. A free ball and other lucky charms from our head sponsor Stamford were also welcome, as I prepared to run the gauntlet of the Kappellenhof.
The free ball lasted exactly one shot, leading to nil points on the first, and so onto to the second and nearest the pin. I managed to make a strong contention for furthest from the pin managing to fire an 8 iron down the first fairway!!! Evil forces were at work.
My game picked up though and by the mid round snack break on the 12th I was back up there. The 12th was longest drive and the force was strong in Lord Alex this day as he launched one 257 meters down the middle, not to be beaten.
Sunday`s result was better than the previous day with many other competitors also posting better scores. There were, however, some noticeable exceptions that I won’t go into — but hope they will return soon rather than throwing their golfing equipment into the nearest water feature.
Back to the muster point (clubhouse) and a fine offering of smoked ham and potato salad, washed down with one or two tonic waters (driving L ). Prize giving got underway, with Maid Nora in charge, ably assisted by Duke Daniel and Dick the Black Knight making sure no one ran off with a coloured envelope. There were some excellent scores fielded in all categories with some managing to play their handicap down. Wizard Ron’s photos say it all.
Another great weekend in Bad Bellingen, and looking forward to returning for the Ryder Cup competition against the Basler Baggers on July 24th. Big thanks of course to the Hotel, to Nora and all the helpers Dawn, Nata and Colette.
NEXT STOP – ROUND 5 STEISSLINGEN
P.S Apologies to all fantasy tale authors .